The Jockeys Nostril

[Mups]

It's good tohear they have released the Landlord in time for Christmas,  thank you for letting us know. 

Mucky Maureen has already taken her radio down the cellar, and put some nice soft lighting down there.   Kev has been been sneaking round the local Turkey farm at night, hoping to trap a couple of them - he said  it makes more profit than buying one!

Barry was last seen cleaning the felt on the billiard tables -  he says he will polish his balls later.

A couple of wheelie bins were nicked from further up the road, to put all the car park's old chips bags and
crisp packets in,  and Willy the window cleaner is filling his buckets as we speak.

The decorations need to come out of the loft,  then all we need will be  a response from Father Christmas to confirm he will be here on the night.   

[Scrumpy]

Dickie will , again, be the fairy on top of the tree..
 Ashley and Phil will be his Little  Helpers..
Roland will hand out his nuts behind the bar..
Ethel will crack them with her new dentures..
 And our local roofer will be Santa.. Who has been stuck up there since last August..

[klondike]

The landlord was moaning elsewhere about having 6 rubbish bags, I expect either he's fly tipped them or one of the regulars has nipped them home to sort through.

[Vlad]

God bless ye merry gentlemen and wimmen, the bar is open and at this time of goodwill to all men and wimmen...the bar is now open..Mups is buying fill your boots, mine is a double lager please.

[GrannyMac]

A warming brandy please, later.  Although it's 5pm somewhere in the world I suppose! Cheers everyone 🥂

[Scrumpy]

I'll have what the others are having.... It's good to share...

[klondike]

I love sharing. Sharing somebody else's naturally...

[Mups]

OK.  I will buy a round,  but at these prices it will only be ONCE! 
I will meet you at the bar at 12 noon.   

[Vlad]

OK.  I will buy a round,  but at these prices it will only be ONCE! 
I will meet you at the bar at 12 moon. 

I'm here

[GrannyMac]

I was somewhere else. 

[Vlad]

I was somewhere else.

Behind the bar I hope

[GrannyMac]

If I could only remember....🥴

[Vlad]

If I could only remember....🥴

Well you could dust off the complimentary nuts and pull me a double lager please.

[klondike]

Do you want somebody to pass them up or are you coming down and taking a break?

[Mups]

There is half price Pasties on the menu lunchtime  . . . .  mind you,  I did hear they are the ones left over from last week.   Apparently Kev was too stoned to go out and get fresh ones.