The Raptures

[Vlad]

According to American Christian Evangelicals, the "Raptures" commence on Tuesday 23rd Sept.
If you are one of the ungodly then you are a loser big time. The  'Rapture' is an end-time event when all dead Christian believers will be and, joined with Christians who are still alive, together will rise in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air. Ok? Got it ?
Apparently the American believers are actually right now selling everything, houses, cars possessions what they are going to with all that cash no one has explained or if the Rapture only for Americans.Apparently there is some advice going around  on what to do when it happens, i.e. ' raise your arms above your head and look up, not down' sounds a bit like the safety brief on an Easy Jet flight to Malaga
A load of cobblers of course but if you are god botherer and you are worried that this might affect you there is an easier way to redemption, a British way...
Pop into the Jockeys Nostril on Tuesday lunchtime and listen to the words of Pastor Vlad, genial host and manager. And the words shall be, "Mine is a large lager thank you very much" and drink of the holy lager and eat of the anointed complimentary nuts and you will receive redemption......
On the other hand you could stay there all day, watch the footie get legless and hope when you wake up on Wednesday that they got the date wrong again. A bit of a bugger for all the Yanks who sold everything though.

[klondike]

There's a lot of it about. Especially in America. An odd mix God and Guns but find a yank and they'll probably be keen on one, the other or both. After scanning that for typos I realise I have left an opening for Phil or maybe Dex to make a remark. Hey Ho.

[Michael Rolls]

how silly can folk get?

[Dextrous63]

I'm trying to work out if my cold has entirely befuddled my brain or not.  First some weird thread about an Inverter with piccies of computer cooling fans in it, and now this 🤷🏻�♂️

The only reality I can cling onto for sure is the need to be well enough to nip to Iceland on Tuesday for the discounts that old folk get.

[Michael Rolls]

Go for it!

[Scrumpy]

Raptures Day.. !!  
They were  the days Harry would return from the pub after being there for a few days..
 He used to help the landlady out... He said she was busy and needed a pair of extra hands.. 
 

[Dextrous63]

😬😬😬

[JBR]

Sounds popular.  Perhaps they meant ruptures?

[Vlad]

Sounds popular.  Perhaps they meant ruptures?

It does seem to have been a bit of a non event, I have unpacked.