Did you know..

[Scrumpy]

That the Americans have a rehearsal wedding dinner paid for by the grooms parents..
The actual wedding is paid for by the brides parents..

Who needs a rehearsal dinner.. !!
We all know how to eat.. ..
What a carry on..

At my wedding Sam and I went to the Registry Office..
We had family and friends there..
Then we all went down the pub..
It was brilliant.. And we all knew how to eat sausage rolls and sandwiches...

[Alex]

Same with me Scrumps, Registry Office with friends and family, then down the pub     I had the full monty when I was 19   

[Michael Rolls]

How does one rehearse eating? Not swallow?

[Mups]

I am not surprised at anything the Americans do.  

[Michael Rolls]

Nor me

[Scrumpy]

Our youngsters need help obtaining mortgages ..
Not having thousands spent on fancy weddings .. All a waste of money..

Weddings.. !!!
Who do we invite.. !!!
Not uncle Harry .. he gets stroppy when he's had a drink.. But Aunty Maggie , his wife, is lovely..
If you invite your cousin Lucy you have to invite cousin Barry and his wife, whom you've never met.
And what about your dad's sister from up north.. can't remember her name or that of her husband..
Do we invite children or not.. !!  They are a bloody nuisance and hog the dance floor.. But little Tilly is lovely.. she can come..
And so it goes on.. 
A drink at the pub ... sausage rolls and a finger buffet... Sorted..

[Dextrous63]

I trust that "sausage rolls" and "finger buffets" aren't euphemisms.

As the old joke used to go... what has a wedding night and a kitchen table got in common?

Four legs and no drawers.

[Vlad]

Boom boom! It's the way you tell 'em 😀😀😀🥹

[klondike]

Went down like an osmium balloon though