The boring thread.....

[Alex]

Bought a garden brolly so I knew it would rain

[Scrumpy]

just had poached egg on toast with squashed avocado..
 The decking is definitely being repaired today.. No rain here...... yet.

Alexa has just told me that rain is likely at 11 am..  That's knocked the decking on the head..

[Raven]

Bought a garden brolly so I knew it would rain

Soooo, it's your fault the weather's crap. 

[Alex]

Looks like !

[Raven]

I can't wait for Scotland to get summer this year, I hope it's on a weekend. 

[Mups]

Mups.. Do you replace your own windscreen wipers.?
I take my car to the garage when wipers need replacing..
I think I'm doing something wrong..
Are they easy to replace. ?

Sorry Scrumpy,  only just seen your post.

No I don't replace my own wipers,  the young lad in the spares shop did it for me.
Just as well,  because he had a bit of bother getting them to slide into the slots half way along the blade,  so I doubt I would have been able to do it. 

It cost me £27 for the two including fitting them.

[Scrumpy]

Thank you Mups..

My lawn mower is out..  at the ready.. Coffee first then fit to trot..

[Scrumpy]

I'm sat here all on my own.. Norma no- friends..

[Alex]

Me too today Scrumps 

[Vlad]

Damn that's so depressing...I almost shed a tear.....

[Mups]

Me too today Scrumps 

Me, three as well. . . 

[Vlad]

Ladies!
I have been in contact with Vlad Therapy Services Ltd, (a division of Vlad Enterprises Co.) 
And they suggest the following treatment.

'Are you down in the dumps, tired, depressed or just feeling lonely?'
If so Vlad Therapy Services Ltd has the answer.

Join together in a circle with your arms around each other.
Place a Vlad in the centre of the circle.
Hug each tightly for 30 minutes....naked


Note. 1 you can find a Vlad in the bar of the Jockeys Nostril.
Note. 2 this procedure although not guaranteed to make you feel better it will certainly help your Vlad.
Note. 3 this procedure I'd best carried out in the privacy of Alan D Lords flat.

You have not been charged for this advice, although a small donation to the Vlad Home for Unwed Mothers would be appreciated.

[Scrumpy]

Naked!! Naked!! That on its own would be the biggest laugh of the day..
I walked out of the bathroom once.. saw myself in a long mirror.. Scary.. 
I would never do that again..

[Vlad]

Naked!! Naked!! That on its own would be the biggest laugh of the day..
I walked out of the bathroom once.. saw myself in a long mirror.. Scary..
I would never do that again..

I have done the same...looked in the mirror...I think I am anorexic because all I could see was a fat old bloke.

[klondike]

Fight it. Try to force down a few pies.