Embarrassing moments

[klondike]

I changed my car recently and not everything is set as I want it yet. I had played about with the rear headrests and left the centre one up. It irritated me in the rearview mirror so I decided to put it down. As it was raining when I got home I quickly nipped out of the front and into the back shutting the door as I'm on a main road.

Headrest down. Go to get out. Kiddie locked  The remote only opens the front doors. The control on the dash too. There may be some other control that does it but I don't know of it. I have to clamber from the back into the front to get out.

Then I see the bus queue across the road who I have probably been entertaining  Then the bus turned up so if I'd waited there would have been few witnesses.

[Michael Rolls]

oh dear! Years ago, a friend of mine borrowed his brother's car and left it over the weekend at the Heathrow long stay. Car was an 1100 in a fairly common colour. Got back from the business trip and couldn't find the car, or to be more accurate he found several 1100s in the right colour but couldn't work out which one belonged to his brother. Ended up having to ring his brother to check the registration - and even then took ages to find the right car

[klondike]

Another for me I afraid. A long time ago.

Coming out of B&Q with some bags of sand and cement on a trolley Clicked remote. Lights flashed and a click. Lifted boot and bloke just behind asked why I'd opened his boot. I must have been away with the fairies. My car was two further on. He'd clicked his when I clicked mine and I just went for the nearest car that had opened. At least it was the same colour as mine.

[Alex]

Don't know whether to post this, you might not think it's funny but......after the event it was. 
Liverpool were playing in Athens in the European Cup Final I got a flight booked but then couldn't get a ticket, but my match friend did.  Cut the story short, a fella I worked with bought my flight from me as his partner was in Athens with a TV company so he knew he'd be ok to get into the stadium.  I drove my friend and work colleague to the airport, it must have been almost 2 o'clock in the morning when we all went into the terminal.  The place was buzzing, fans were singing and flying the flags, and I was feelimg sorry for myself because I wasn't going. 

Eventually my friends went through to the departure lounge, I said my goodbyes and walked out back to the car. I looked up and down the rows for it, but my mind was blank, couldn't even remember whether to go left or right.   It was obviously dark, I was on my own and getting a bit nervous  I then spotted an airport worker on a buggy, hoping he'd feel sorry for me I asked if he could help me find my car.  He asked me what make, colour I then said to him "It's got a big LFC flag hanging from the back window"   He stared at me for a few seconds then burst out laughing and said "well that should make it easier to find    "  I felt an idiot, almost every bloody car there had an LFC flag on it !  He did find it for me though.....    

[klondike]

[Scrumpy]

Tried for ages to get into my car in a station car park.. 
Me and my mate couldn't work it out.. 
Wrong car.. It had more doors than mine and not even the same make.. !!  Just the same colour..

Held up a queue because I couldn't get my card to work in the pay parking machine.. The guy behind asked I he could help.. even he tried with my card.. 
I was my Co-op Membership card... 

[klondike]

More embarrassment down to senility yesterday. I was having my eyes checked at the hospital. I only have distance glasses and tend not to wear them much as I can't see anything close when I do so they spend most of the time perched on top of my head if I take them anywhere which I did yesterday considering where I was going.

It was a merry go round of different people each doing a diffent check in a different room. I'd just come out from the last and was leaving when I reached on top of my head to put my glasses on securely. They weren't there. I remembered putting them on the table at the last port of call and made my way back. I asked one of the nurses where the doctors room was as I thought I'd left my glasses there.

She solved the problem in double quick time. I was wearing them. The spectre of the nursing home grows ever stronger.

[morty]

Yes but all these things are down to forgetfulness .... not stupidity.

I can be stupid. Hard to believe I know. I once sawed through a gas pipe with a cigarette hanging out of my mouth in true Bet Lynch style. ... but you can imagine that one so I'll mention this one instead.

Also stupid.
It was one of those days after a nightime storm when you dart out in the lashing rain, into the garden  on a seek and find mission to rectify the damage from the night before.

We had a row of plant pots lined up on the edge of the shed roof, Mr M put them there as a barricade to deter immigrant cats from coming into the garden, except they just walked between them ... anyway, I digress as I'm wont to do .. .  they were askew, one or two had fallen off, one or two had fallen on their sides ... so I stepped up on the ledge, balanced one foot on the water butt and one on the corner of the shed roof, reached over .... and lost my balance... and ended up with my super size backside plugged into the butt like a cork. 
Ugh.. that water was cold and soaked right through.
And where, you might ask, was the lid to the water butt which would have stopped me falling in.
Mr M had left it off to deter the cats. 

 

[klondike]

[Michael Rolls]

t'other day visited Veronica's grave, went to the paper shop and got the paper, then decided to have a bit of a drive around. Wearing my imitation Barbour which I took off or I would be too warm in the car. Tossed it onto the front passenger seat. Drove for an hour or so, got home. Picked up jacket,  tossed it onto a chair in the conservatory, mooned around for a while then remembered the mobile was still in the jacket. Its battery doesn't have much life left so it needs to be almost permanently on charge. Went to the jacket, and it wasn't in the pocket. Must have fallen out in the car. Nope, after about ten minutes trying every nook and cranny, had to accept that it wasn't there. Started to panic - suppose it had fallen out as I took the jacket off and was now lying in the road?
Went back into the house to put the jacket back on prior to driving back to the village. As I walked back into the conservatory, there was the jacket on the chair where I had left it - I'd looked in the wrong jacket.    

[klondike]

Look on the bright side - you realised your phone was missing. I often don't for quite a while.

[Raven]

I panic when I can't find my phone, it sits on the mantelpiece in my living room or in Himself's if I'm up north. It has it's wee shelf in the car and that's where it should be unless it's in my pocket if I'm walking Dagues. But I still manage to misplace it sometimes. I phone it from the landlines and usually hear it, it I don't then.......PANIC.

[Scrumpy]

Do you all know your mobile number..?
I have to look mine up.. I have no idea.. 
I don't even know my car registration.. I know the colour.. !!

[klondike]

It's when others panic it can be embarrassing.

I'd arranged to go out with #1 son and he was picking me up but only at a very vague time. I usually keep my phone in my pocket and most contacts are via Whatsapp. About 15 minutes after the approximate time I went in my pocket to get an update. No phone. I weigh myself most mornings and the results get uploaded to an app which I never look at again as it can be depressing. I'd left the phone upstais by the scales. The phone is full of Whatsapp messages from #1 son and #2 daughter both have tried ringing my mobile and the house phone (gone now I've changed BB provider). The doorbell rings. #1 son has arrived anyway possibly expecting a corpse.

March 29, 2023, 09:14:33 AM
I learned my mobile number as so many forms request it and I always port it if switching provider. I knew my landline too for the same reason. When I switched to fibre BB they couldn't port that number over and I never did learn the new one. Now it has gone.

I always make sure I remember my car number. They all look the same to me these days.

[Scrumpy]

My daughter reports me  *** MISSING** to other family members if I don't reply to her text/phone call after a certain length of time..