The Jockeys Nostril

[Dextrous63]

Maybe he got the recipe from cat-a-wring school?

There's paws for thought.  😬

[morty]

There's a definite 'ordure de socks' in here .   

[Vlad]

Maybe he got the recipe from cat-a-wring school?

There's paws for thought.  😬

Oh gawd!!!!!!!

[Dextrous63]

Oh gawd!!!!!!!

I've got another 8 cat tales to tell.

[morty]

For a minute there I thought you'd gone all nautical again with the cat of 9 tails....

[Dextrous63]

For a minute there I thought you'd gone all nautical again with the cat of 9 tails....

I read 4 books, but then the next ones would require me to pay for them.  Fat chance of that.

[Mups]

If this bar is going to reopen for Christmas,  I presume they have let the landlord out again now?   

[klondike]

I think there is an ankle tag involved....

[Scrumpy]

... and chains.. Maybe a whip.. Just sayin'

[Dextrous63]

... and chains.. Maybe a whip.. Just sayin'

Ah well; Christmas is coming 😬😬

[Ruthio]

Ah well; Christmas is coming 😬😬

[Vlad]

... and chains.. Maybe a whip.. Just sayin'

Ahhh......

An old tale....This is gonna need more than a wipe down with an oily rag' stated Mups , disapprovingly ..her  merchant navy cap sat at a jaunty angle, her grizzled weather beaten face matching that of the stuffed and worn parrot on her shoulder, 'let's go below decks'...

The smell was physical..it invaded all the senses..blocked toilets, fermenting Watneys Red Barrel casks broken bottles of vintage carrot wine all adding to the ambience..we moved quickly past the dungeon, the sign, Palace of Pain did little to persuade us to tarry.
We returned to the bar..the corpse of the cat had disappeared, this was worrying......

[Dextrous63]

Watneys.  There's a blast from the past.

[Vlad]

'Top Deck? ' 
I nodded. Mups  still harked back to her time as a cabin girl  aboard Vlads Floating Garden (another tale coming to a screen near you soon) and often used nautical terms, I humoured her , we went back a long way.

The glass fronted lift 'Platinum Card Holders Only' took us slowly with much groaning and clacking to, the Landlords Flat, Penthouse, Presidential Suite...we were met with an unmade bed, a silk smoking jacket and an empty condom machine ..a list of female names on a chalkboard, some ticked and scored out of 10 hung on the wall. Monitor screens now operating showed pictures of the cash till, the ladies loo and swimming pool, ( a hole in the ground containing two shopping trolleys and a tyre, and listed in the top ten holes in the ground at the Sheffield Museum of Holes and Cavities)


We returned to the bar..there was still no sign of the cat...

[Scrumpy]

..it's been catnapped!!