Early signs of dementia

[Scrumpy]

What fills me with dread is to consider the years ahead alone...

The words above written by Zoony says it all..
Being alone and lonely is boring for your brain.. We need something to get up for..
I am willing to have a coffee with anyone on here who needs a (stimulating) brain to chat to.. At an arranged time I will chat on Facetime .. It doesn't have to be a regular thing ,even a one off is fine by me.. Just a suggestion.. Private Message me if interested..


Forget the word stimulating.. typing error..

[1955vintage]

My mother at 87 was as sharp as a tack and looked after my father, who joined the fairies as she put , ten years earlier. She did a fantastic job of looking after him and they devised strategies when he was lucid to cope. When he was on his last legs due to heart failure, she had a fall and died two days later, leaving me to look after him. Mum had hidden the degree of confusion from me , 'so I didn't worry'.


I had to search the house for his meds, he would take them if he found them, irrespective of when he had taken them before. While hunting, I found £1,100 in cash that Mum has tucked away in various places. He lived for another three weeks after Mum passing , most of which was in hospital after he contracted pneumonia.


When he went into hospital , he told the mental health nurse he had been married for 35 years and his wife would be coming to collect him. She was surprised to learn they had had their 65th anniversary just before she died. The most difficult part was his ' Where's Joan? ' start to each day. Explaining that his wife and partner of 65 years had died was always difficult. After a week of telling him, I discussed it with my daughter. Should I say, she has run off with the milkman , as a change. My daughter was horrified, no, George Clooney, she would have loved that.

[Scrumpy]

Sad, but humorous... 

[klondike]

I only knew one of my grandmothers. She had both poor health and dementia. She spent her last years in bed at my parents just a few feet from where I sit now in fact. It wasn't nice.

I knew both of my wifes' grandmothers but mostly from visits to care homes.

One was completely away with the fairies and as happy as a sandboy. She kept telling my father in law it was time he got a girlfriend and broke out from the home to roam the street in nightie and slippers at least twice.

The other was entirely compos mentis but unable to walk. She was as miserable as sin from getting stuck in front of a TV with a lot of completely doo lally old women. Her constant refrain was "dont use that chair Lilly (or whatever) sits in it and pees herself.

It's time we had the equivalent of Dignitas here. I'd use it in an instant rather than face either of those womens' final years.

[crabbyob]

But how might we know it was time.....
we all have bad days, might you feel the bad day was a sign it was time...
the grim reaper will decide when its my time... sooner.... or later...

[Alex]

I think we should have Dignitas here too, but would hope it wouldn't cost £10,000 which I believe is the average cost of a trip to Switzerland.  I think you'd know when it was time.

[klondike]

It's a lot more dignified and less messy than the alternatives. I'm wondering whether I should start skeet shooting for instance at some point. That wouldn't cost £10k

[crabbyob]

no mate.... fishing will keep you in touch wi yer humanity....

[Cassandra]

Cass, I'm curious. Are you very far from Petosky?

A couple of hundred miles directly north up the M46. Funnily enough I was there just before Xmas. My cousin was 'piloting' an interstate courier plane service before the holidays to help out delivering parcels. Next stop Canada of course, I went with him, to pour the coffee:smiley: it took us about an hour over spectacular country - do you know it?

[Cassandra]

Sounds like your fast becoming a local Cass. How are the horses? Did you get them a big beach ball?

Hello Raven,

Yes thank you, they both bang the stable doors morning and evening with them now. Sort of room service alert, very funny and they look so pleased with themselves when it arrives too!

Loads of head nodding and snorting!

[zoony]

Not really.. The band and I were stranded there by an ice-storm a long time ago and I was impressed by the place and people, not to mention exploding trees! There was an old railway bridge over the road somewhere nearby with I LOVE YOU MARY SCHIMINSKY written in large white letters right across it. ..

[zoony]

Hello Raven,

Yes thank you, they both bang the stable doors morning and evening with them now. Sort of room service alert, very funny and they look so pleased with themselves when it arrives too!

Loads of head nodding and snorting!

That's precious! 'D love to see them meet Raven's big Clydes..

[Cassandra]

I said I was turning into my mother? Well I wasn't really joking.. I'm becoming ever-more grumpy and humourless which are characteristics in my family.. Not a good feeling..

I'm getting more like my dad, thankfully he was a delightful eccentric, as he aged, sounding and behaving like more like 'Tinker' (played so wonderfully by Dudley Sutton) in 'Lovejoy'.

For example he once rung the flat, following a 'huge' day out with all his chums from the Press and Bar.

"Junior" he said, "I've had a bloody marvellous day, haven't a clue where I am, but I'm staying! - put out the cat".

(he didn't have one)

[crabbyob]

well i hope i am nothing like my father [but sometimes like Zoony see little flashes of him in my behavior]

[zoony]

Well, on the bright side, we all know who our fathers were.