Teacher who had sex with school boys

[Vlad]

The problem is that obviously you haven't made yourself sufficiently attractive.
You could try stuffing something large down the front of your pants to enhance your appearance.

Not something I have ever had to worry about JB, I am required under a rather weird H&S law to wear a large label on it which states: Do not stare, it senses fear! It's a cross I have had to bear mate

[JBR]

Not something I have ever had to worry about JB, I am required under a rather weird H&S law to wear a large label on it which states: Do not stare, it senses fear! It's a cross I have had to bear mate

Nowt like being modest, eh?
Of course, I have the same problem.

[klondike]

Perhaps I should set up a Jake the Peg group for the pair of you to enlist in. Mind you after the Rolf Harris prosecution it may not be a good idea come to think of it.

[Vlad]

Perhaps I should set up a Jake the Peg group for the pair of you to enlist in. Mind you after the Rolf Harris prosecution it may not be a good idea come to think of it.

Indeed, I have to tread warily, in case I stand on it.

[muddy]

[JBR]

Indeed, I have to tread warily, in case I stand on it.

Stand on it?  I have to be careful not to trip over mine.

[Vlad]

Stand on it?  I have to be careful not to trip over mine.

You lie like a cheap Japanese watch JB 😀

[JBR]

You lie like a cheap Japanese watch JB 😀

Good point.  I confess that I even find it difficult to lie down because of it.

[Mups]

Will you two stop boasting!

Just tuck the damn things in your socks and be done with.  

[JBR]

Will you two stop boasting!

Just tuck the damn things in your socks and be done with. 

I'm afraid that my socks are too close.  
What I could do, I suppose (and I assure you that I am not indulging in one-upmanship), is to wind it around my waist three or four times to keep it out of the way.