When Dex came in and saw the Bill
He had to take a calming pill

A couple of interesting facts about me..

1. My willy is the same length of two Argos pencils laid end to end.
2. I am banned from Argos.

Same here today, it's a bit depressing the cold AND rain 

They looked in the bushes, and around the gate
Trouble was it was getting so late
No key.. no service.. that was the trub (short for trouble)
So they all said 'Amen' and went to the pub
As Dex hadn't turned up it all went on his slate

It'll get worse but about 4 weeks from now we'll be back to how it is now and over the hump.

    Christmas long past indeed

reminds me of the tale of Christmas long past. SC and the elves were slaving away because the weather had been milder then usual. There was a knock at the door, and, seething with frustration, SC answered it to find a fairy there with a Christmas tree. Treating SC to a beaming smile she said 'were would you like me to stick this, Santa?' And that was the start of the fairy in the top of the tree

had rain every day so far this month - oh, pitch black just after four

Tease as I may, you're always a lovely lady as far as I'm concerned.