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Main boards => Jokes => Topic started by: Alex on April 07, 2023, 12:47:59 PM

Title: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: Alex on April 07, 2023, 12:47:59 PM
It's not really a joke, but she does look a bit like a clown.  What has this allegedly intelligent woman done to herself  ?

(https://i.postimg.cc/prSJcSkH/vorderman.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/2L4WV2Pc)
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: Scrumpy on April 07, 2023, 12:56:56 PM

Intelligent she is not.. Clever with numbers she is..
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: Jacqueline on April 07, 2023, 01:22:18 PM
She won't drown that's for sure.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: Michael Rolls on April 07, 2023, 01:31:03 PM
oh dear - I used to think her quite attractive - not any more
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 07, 2023, 07:40:56 PM
Two from the top, one from the middles and the rest from the bottom please Carol
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: GrannyMac on April 07, 2023, 08:52:05 PM
OMG! Her face looks ok. 
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:00:24 PM
Her face is the best bit ... but she has a fixed smile stuck on it all the time now. Do her face muscles not move anymore?

The rest of her. Awful. Like a spacehoppers mating party. 
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 07, 2023, 09:09:46 PM
Quote from: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:00:24 PMHer face is the best bit ... but she has a fixed smile stuck on it all the time now. Do her face muscles not move anymore?

The rest of her. Awful. Like a spacehoppers mating party.
Maybe the weight of her buttocks is pulling the skin back from her mouth and down her neck and back, so she is baring her teeth all the time.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:13:23 PM
You've given this some thought haven't you Dex?
I bet you had a Meccano set as a youngster.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 07, 2023, 09:16:34 PM
Quote from: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:13:23 PMYou've given this some thought haven't you Dex?
I bet you had a Meccano set as a youngster.
Yep.  Although in this instance Morty, I think my plasticine would have been more appropriate 
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:25:27 PM
I do always wonder how such well endowed ladies manage to fit behind their steering wheels..... and what happens if the air bags go off.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 07, 2023, 09:27:59 PM
Quote from: morty on April 07, 2023, 09:25:27 PMI do always wonder how such well endowed ladies manage to fit behind their steering wheels..... and what happens if the air bags go off.
I think Vorderman's airbags have already gone off!!

April 07, 2023, 09:35:51 PM
What I want to know is what shop sells those clothes?  Presumably they must have a "freak" section somewhere, in which a drunken seamstress took her eyes off the sewing machine for a few seconds.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: JBR on April 07, 2023, 11:34:08 PM
Whether she, and others like her, wants to make a real mess of her body is entirely up to her.
Personally, I cannot see the attraction of unnaturally enormous boobs or buttocks.

You know, if they really feel the need to do it, someone should invent inflatable bras and knickers which could appear exactly the same, yet when the novelty has worn off, there'd be no need for expensive surgery to put things right.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 08, 2023, 04:51:11 AM
Good idea.  Michelin man suit springs to mind.

The other advantage, of course, would be that the pall bearers wouldn't have to contend with the added weight of silicon inserts coupled with the need for a supersized coffin.  Come to think of it, I wonder if those silicon bags would be removed prior to incineration at the crematorium?
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: klondike on April 08, 2023, 10:19:31 AM
Quote from: JBR on April 07, 2023, 11:34:08 PMPersonally, I cannot see the attraction of unnaturally enormous boobs or buttocks.
Maybe she had a morbid fear of falling over and being unable to get back up. No problem now she'd bounce right back.

They say dyslexics look in a mirror and just see fat fat fat. Maybe this sort of thing along with trout lips etc. is some sort of lillness.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 08, 2023, 10:50:40 AM
Furniture shops will be happy.  She'll be getting replacement sofas and beds every year.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: morty on April 08, 2023, 06:35:51 PM
I can understand wanting to turn back the advance of time ... but I think ... what will she do when she's about 90 and struggling along with a rollator walker thingy. 
It's not going to be a good look when she's shuffling along with a stooped back.

I've seen some women who look good, as if they've known when to stop and just discreetly improve what they've got ... 
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 08, 2023, 11:17:12 PM
Quote from: morty on April 08, 2023, 06:35:51 PMI can understand wanting to turn back the advance of time ... but I think ... what will she do when she's about 90 and struggling along with a rollator walker thingy.
It's not going to be a good look when she's shuffling along with a stooped back.

She'll be a perfect sphere by then and able to roll around with total ease.  She'll just need some large egg cups to sit in while she watches old clips of Countdown, when she was attractive and "normal"
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: klondike on April 09, 2023, 10:03:57 AM
As I said earlier I don't think people who do this see themselves as most others do. They firmly believe it makes them attractive rather than a figure of fun. It's sad in a way.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: Diasi on April 09, 2023, 10:06:11 AM
Quote from: klondike on April 09, 2023, 10:03:57 AMAs I said earlier I don't think people who do this see themselves as most others do. They firmly believe it makes them attractive rather than a figure of fun. It's sad in a way.
Well I'd certainly have fun playing with them.  :grin:
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: klondike on April 09, 2023, 10:07:35 AM
I'd be far too wary of the dangers. Think of the breathing difficulties they could cause.
Title: Re: The thinking man's Katie Price
Post by: dextrous63 on April 09, 2023, 10:09:06 AM
Would be cheaper if they went and bought an appropriately convex or concave mirror.

April 09, 2023, 10:09:39 AM
Quote from: klondike on April 09, 2023, 10:07:35 AMI'd be far too wary of the dangers. Think of the breathing difficulties they could cause.
Especially if they wanted to be on top😬